Dementia: ‘Nobody Loves Me: I’m Such a Nuisance’

Image result for I'm Such A Nuisance PictureWhen Maureen woke early this morning she was very sad feeling unloved and a nuisance.  She was beside herself with her loss of independence and her reliance on others. Her feelings are not surprising when you reflect on such a capable woman now being limited by dementia.  I hope my assurances that I loved her and would do all I could to help her rediscover her capabilities and enthusiasm for life had some impact.

Our Circuit Training went well yesterday and a similar approach is needed to address Maureen’s sadness this morning.   If I pitch it right I have no doubt that Maureen will see glimpses of her old self.  Dementia will mean that she forgets those brilliant moments when she shines but the feel good factor will remain.  Her performance on walking around Royal Court by herself yesterday was remarkable.  She stopped at a lamppost outside the house of a new found friend.  I would speculate that she wanted another conversation with her friend from Durham who she had a lovely chat with the other day.

Her performance on walking around Royal Court by herself yesterday was remarkable. She stopped at a lamppost outside the house of a new found friend.  I would speculate that she wanted another conversation with a lady from Durham who she had a lovely chat with the other day.

Circuit Training will take place again today along with another cunning plan.  With luck, I will persuade Maureen to visit a nearby Auntie who looked after her when she was a young child.  Maureen will feel, and remember, the love of this elderly couple and I will get to hear a more about my beautiful wife when she was a little girl: a BOGOF approach to reminiscence therapy!

Just had the first smooch of the day in the kitchen to this one from the Brothers Gibb:

I think the answer from both of us is an emphatic YES.  What I continue to wonder is if Maureen will ever let me lead?

 

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About Remember Me

I am a retired adult educator. My wife had a stroke in February 2014 and now has mixed dementia. Her recovery from stroke has been exceptional apart from 50% loss of peripheral vision and vascular damage. 'Dharma For Dementia' is my approach to being Maureem's Care Partner: it aims to end the suffering of 'Prescribed Disengagement' (Swaffer) .
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