Dementia: ‘They All Know Us!’

 

Image result for citizen khan pictures

We would not be able to cope without the support of lots of people who live in our vicinity.  I often adapt a Citizen Khan quote ‘they all know us’ to summarise our notoriety in our neighbourhood.  What the locals know is that Maureen has dementia and we both need their support on a daily

Local shop assistants are a great help even when they have customers waiting to be served.  We often pop across the road see our friends in local stores who are all willing to give us time and consideration even when we have just called in for a chat.  If I’m out ‘wandering’ by myself the first question locals ask me will generally be associated with Maureen’s welfare.  Whenever she slips out without me noticing it would be unusual if someone doesn’t tip me off that she is out by herself: frequently they ease her back to the safety of her own home.

If ever I’m struggling with her presentation I’m spoiled for choice over whose door I can knock on for a little distraction and redirection.  I can honestly say I have never been turned down at any time of day or night in my hour of need.

When I spotted Hattie and her mum across the road yesterday I thought it was an opportunity too good to miss.  Maureen adores the company of little children and loved having a toddler on our drive.  It’s a shame that both of our families live so far away so I think we might ‘adopt’ Hattie and her brother.  He wasn’t around yesterday as he had gone to visit relatives in Coventry.  If we had known we could have asked him to pop in and see some of ours!

Maureen greeted Girl Sunday with ‘we’re seeing a lot of you lately’ – possibly remembering that she had been with us 24 hours before.  They did some sterling work tidying up while I went to top up our provisions for the week.

Following a siesta, we had a lovely afternoon as Maureen watched me pottering in the garden through the patio doors.  She popped out occasionally to assist and praise my efforts.

With vascular dementia, you can never predict how the day is going to turn out but it was good to enjoy the ‘Day Of Rest’ yesterday after a very busy Saturday!

I completed drafting the above just after 9 pm last night as Maureen lay fast asleep on the sofa.  I’m back on the keyboard shortly after 6 am, so I’m almost sticking to the regime I outlined yesterday and how the last nine hours went are outlined <HERE>.

I’m going to suggest that Girl Monday offers one of her Pamper Days this morning.  She has an excuse to guide Maureen into the shower as she is now half-way into her pregnancy and finds it difficult to bend over the sink.  I’m hoping my ‘Silver Lady’ will look a million dollars when I return from the Leisure Centre – attired in the outfit I have left on a hanger.  With her hair such a beautiful shade now I called up David Soul for her on YouTube yesterday:

 

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About Remember Me

I am a retired adult educator. My wife had a stroke in February 2014 and now has mixed dementia. Her recovery from stroke has been exceptional apart from 50% loss of peripheral vision and vascular damage. 'Dharma For Dementia' is my approach to being Maureem's Care Partner: it aims to end the suffering of 'Prescribed Disengagement' (Swaffer) .
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4 Responses to Dementia: ‘They All Know Us!’

  1. Mary Smith says:

    It’s great you have such a wide support network around you and Maureen.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Remember Me says:

      We have both worked hard to build up a supportive network with those who are never too busy to lend a hand.

      Liked by 2 people

      • Mary Smith says:

        When I moved in with dad I was quite shocked that none of the neighbours called. They would talk to me over the garden fence or if we met in the street but no one ever came to the door. I think, now, they simply didn’t know how to cope or what to say to someone with dementia.

        Like

      • Remember Me says:

        It’s the same here Mary they never call to see how we are but always respond whenever we need help: there’s note as queer as folk!

        Like

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