Dementia: Respite At Last!

Image result for Respite from Caring At Last Picture

We all gave it our best shot yesterday morning trying to persuade Maureen to go into Ashgrove Care Home.  Gary our social worker, Gail our carer along with myself talked the talk but her arguments for staying at home from the day before were repeated.  Just as we were about to call for support from the Home Treatment Team Gary suggested that I could just ‘rock up and drop her off’ telling a ‘Love Lie’ that we were just popping into Ashgrove for a cup of coffee.

Gail and I took Maureen for a walk around Cleethorpes Country Park and popped into Ashgrove on the way back.  Once we were inside staff were primed to settle Maureen so Gail and I could beat a hasty retreat.

Maureen will stay in Ashgrove initially for a week .  I will not visit during that time as I know they will contact me if needed.

My priority during this break is to attempt to sort out my sleep pattern.  I have decided to do this by sleeping in my own bed rather than visit Madyhamaka Buddhist Meditation Centre.

Last night it was  strange being in the house without Maureen.  Music added a feeling of familiarity to my surroundings.   When  I played the first side of The Sound of Music I could have sworn I heard my ‘Singer Lady’ holding forth.  Once I sat down to eat I counted my blessings for the excellent support I had received from professional staff and family members throughout a challenging day.  As I stared at the empty place next to me I  knew that the means justified the ends: Maureen would be well cared for and I would get the rest I needed.

Just for a change, I have updated my Good Music page on time today.  With  Remembrance Sunday around the corner there one contender. I will always be grateful to Izzy, one of my many friends from my days on Talking Point, for making me aware of this song.



About Remember Me

I am a retired adult educator. My wife had a stroke in February 2014 and now has mixed dementia. Her recovery from stroke has been exceptional apart from 50% loss of peripheral vision and vascular damage. 'Dharma For Dementia' is my approach to being Maureem's Care Partner: it aims to end the suffering of 'Prescribed Disengagement' (Swaffer) .
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8 Responses to Dementia: Respite At Last!

  1. Dominique says:

    I am so happy for you Paul. I really hope that you manage to get some well deserved rest, and that Maureen’s stay is uneventful this time. Sad though it may be, you need a break. Enjoy it while you can. xx


  2. anniegoose says:

    stay strong – -during this time away from maureen, work on getting your sleep and your health back up. be well. you are awesome and such an inspiration to many.



    • Remember Me says:

      Thank you for your kind comments. It is always a team effort here. I have been very fortunate to have received high-quality training during my professional career in team building and the management of change. However, I thought at 70 I would be able to put my feet up but adult educators never retire they just go grey (white in my case): what better subject now than the welfare of my beautiful wife!


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