Dementia: ‘Neighbourhood Watch’ Thwarted

Maureen is filled with joy at the moment because she has just thwarted the unofficial ‘Neighbourhood Watch’. She scarpered after I made advances towards her probably because she may not have been sure who I was.  On the other hand I may be losing my charm!

Her delight is caused by avoiding Pat, a near neighbour, who took her by the arm and brought her back home a few weeks ago.  She keeps telling me that she ran past Pat’s house so that she could enjoy being out by herself without being hauled back here like a naughty child.

As soon as I realised what I had done I gave Maureen some space before searching for her in the car.  I returned home after a quarter of an hour to find the front door open and Maureen inside.  She had got into the house via the back door and opened the locked front door from the inside.

Two lessons from this episode: avoid make advances to Maureen if she could be unsure who I am, and never underestimate her capabilities.  As Susan Macaulay and others have reminded me dementia does not progress in a linear fashion.

Edit: Two hours later and I’m in trouble once again for calling Maureen ‘darling’ and she has made it clear she no such thing.  Even  I have to remember to be person-centred and always use her name.  I am maybe getting it because she is too hot and believes she hasn’t any cooler clothes.  Unfortunately, I am making no progress on solving the clothes crisis!

 

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About Remember Me

I am a retired adult educator. My wife had a stroke in February 2014 and now has mixed dementia. Her recovery from stroke has been exceptional apart from 50% loss of peripheral vision and vascular damage. 'Dharma For Dementia' is my approach to being Maureem's Care Partner: it aims to end the suffering of 'Prescribed Disengagement' (Swaffer) .
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2 Responses to Dementia: ‘Neighbourhood Watch’ Thwarted

  1. Oh dear! I have images of her running past Pat’s house rubbing her hands with glee and giggling like a schoolgirl!
    Does she have ID when she goes out? It’s so difficult taking positive risks with your loved one – she clearly wants to retain her independence, but you need to know she is safe.
    I don’t know what to suggest for the clothing issue… can she access or see her clothing easily? would she rummage to find something she would like to wear? (Just thinking out loud) x x

    Like

    • Remember Me says:

      She is safe as can be lots of folk know her and guide her safely back home. We have a digital tracker but she won’t use it. Maureen is so pleased she beat Pat today: such hilarity. I will solve the clothing issue with a little bit of luck and lots of patience.

      Liked by 1 person

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