Dementia: Seeking Boots On The Ground

Yesterday I received excellent support  from Social Services, Admiral Nursing and the Home Treatment Team.  Today I will be taking up the offer of the HTT to put ‘boots on the ground’.  When lines open I will be asking them to send someone out.  A short while afterwards I will be confirming that our Key Worker is back on duty and will be able to keep to her appointment here on Thursday morning.  Around 11am I will update Peter from Admiral Nursing as we arranged yesterday.

Maureen is in emotional turmoil this morning: it’s just another focus today.  She started off being very upset about her car being used without her permission.  She suggested giving it to her children so they would find it easier to visit Cleethorpes: she has forgotten they are all members of two car families.  I have told her I have removed the rotor arm to make sure no-one can use it – hope she doesn’t twig I haven’t a clue where it is on modern cars.  From now on it will remain on the drive unless she is in the passenger seat.

For the last hour or so she has been on the socks and shoes issue: nothing fits or is comfortable.  Last night she had the same complaint about underwear but my offer to take her to Marks and Sparks this morning has been long forgotten.

Maureen broke down in floods of tears yesterday evening when she declined taking a phone call from her son.  She told me later she daren’t stop what she was doing or she would forget how to bring the washing in and then there would be nothing she could do.  I couldn’t think of a response apart from holding her tight.

I have had a few hours’ sleep in between visits to the loo and Maureen waking for various reasons.  At 3.30 am she talked for some time about her father and what a wonderful man he was.  When this conversation was over I got up to sort more paperwork.  It’s a shame I never got to meet ‘Union Jack’ as we would have had a lot in common.

It looks like being another lovely day here in Cleethorpes and a bit of sunshine always helps us on our journey.

Edit: My mechanic has just told me rotor arms were phazed out in the 90’s: apparently there is no distributor now it’s a coil pack.   I’d better get myself a spark plug lead from somewhere just in case Maureen twigs I’m trying to pull a fast-one.

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About Remember Me

I am a retired adult educator. My wife had a stroke in February 2014 and now has mixed dementia. Her recovery from stroke has been exceptional apart from 50% loss of peripheral vision and vascular damage. 'Dharma For Dementia' is my approach to being Maureem's Care Partner: it aims to end the suffering of 'Prescribed Disengagement' (Swaffer) .
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