Dementia: Stick To Plain English

I have been concerned lately about how much Maureen has been sleeping: last night her short doze on the sofa came to my rescue.  Around 9 ‘o’clock ‘I Iost it’, and a rather heated exchange took place. I had been dozing myself whilst watching T V, and awoke as Maureen came into the room.  Several misunderstandings took place in our interaction, and I ended up telling Maureen to go away in my best Anglo Saxon.  A short while afterwards I tried to dig myself out of a big hole, and Maureen suggested I might like to sleep in the car.

It is possible that I had waited my moment to tell Maureen to ‘go away’, as she had used the same parting shot as I left for London a couple of weeks ago.  If revenge is sweet I was certainly not experiencing a warm feeling at all:  in fact quite the opposite for needlessly upsetting the apple cart. If Tim, one of my nephews had been with us last night I know what he would have said: ‘language Uncle Paul’.  He wouldn’t have liked me talking like that to one of his ‘Favourite Ladies’.

I let Maureen doze for half an hour after my expletive and then played Prince Charming.  Sleeping Beauty woke up with no apparent memory of my misdemeanour.  It’s one of the few occasions when I’ve been grateful for the consequences of dementia on Maureen’s memory.

I’ll try to stick to plain English from now on!

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About Remember Me

I am a retired adult educator. My wife had a stroke in February 2014 and now has mixed dementia. Her recovery from stroke has been exceptional apart from 50% loss of peripheral vision and vascular damage. 'Dharma For Dementia' is my approach to being Maureem's Care Partner: it aims to end the suffering of 'Prescribed Disengagement' (Swaffer) .
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4 Responses to Dementia: Stick To Plain English

  1. Kathy from CT says:

    Please forgive yourself. You are human, after all; and a super one at that, with your deep well of patience and love.

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  2. Remember Me says:

    I have don’t worry but no need to be lazy with the spoken word.

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  3. ebjz says:

    It is so easy for misunderstandings to take place, and NOT easy to always be in control of how we respond to them, especially when we’re exhausted and emotionally worn down from the stresses of caregiving. Of course I understand your concern here, but you also need to allow yourself–find some outlet–to “lose it” from time to time. Please go easy on yourself. 🙂

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  4. Remember Me says:

    Thanks for your concern. I’m starting to use public transport and walk rather than hop in the car. This is such a simple thing to do and has so many benefits. I’m also building in periods of meditation into my days. Thses new outlets are really helpful.

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