Dementia: Four Significant Questions

Sue our social worker popped in for an hour yesterday morning for one of her regular calls. She has a lovely way with Maureen and I left them chatting while I carried on with one or two things around the house.  Her visit clearly worried Maureen as she wondered ‘why that woman was asking how she folded sheets?  Maureen had concerns that she was trying to establish if we still needed Chloe, our carer, and if she could sort out the sheets by herself.  I did my best to reassure her that Sue’s motives were sound but I doubt I have eased her concerns about ‘all these people who are taking over our home’.

When I returned from a short shopping late afternoon  Maureen said she was going back to bed as 5 ‘o’clock was too early to get up.  She then asked me if I was going to join her in bed.   I said I would be with her in a few minutes after tidying up the kitchen, knowing she would be sound asleep within minutes.

When I turned if for the night around 10.30 Maureen stirred and asked me her final question of the day.  She wanted to know if she had upset some people and that was why they had stopped phoning or coming to see her.  Maureen also wondered if they knew she had been ill.  I tried to reassure by telling her how busy folk were these days with work and their families.

Maureen’s intellect shines through day after day.  Her four questions were all valid. When she has energy you wouldn’t know that stroke has caused brain damage:  when she is tired it’s a different story.

This song from Johnny Nash is perhaps the best way to close this post:

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About Remember Me

I am a retired adult educator. My wife had a stroke in February 2014 and now has mixed dementia. Her recovery from stroke has been exceptional apart from 50% loss of peripheral vision and vascular damage. 'Dharma For Dementia' is my approach to being Maureem's Care Partner: it aims to end the suffering of 'Prescribed Disengagement' (Swaffer) .
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